How confident are you in the workplace?

Self-confidence is, essentially, a good feeling about yourself and your capabilities. So far, so easy — but it can be a sticking point for many women: too little, and you’re undoubtedly missing out valuable opportunities for personal and career growth. Too much — well, is there such a thing? Perhaps not, but without warmth and balanced expression it can come across as alienating arrogance or narcissism. Those who never give confidence a second thought will know whether they have it — but they may still surprise themselves with this quiz. For everyone else, these questions will shine some light on your current confidence curve and what you need to do to keep it going up and up…

 

When goal-setting, I usually think about:

1. What I want in the medium- to short-term. I write the goals down but in my heart of hearts I know I won’t really prioritise them, which erodes my confidence in my ability to achieve them.
2. Who can help me to get where I want to go. I am not afraid to ask for help, but don’t have a lot of time to pay back the favour. My network seems to have a high turnover of people in it.
3. Setting achievable goals in business or personal life, and then I break them down into smaller goals. This way, I can think about the big picture and the small steps to get there, without feeling overwhelmed.

 

You lead a project that is not as successful as you had hoped. Do you:

1. Cry. Then go home and sit on your sofa, staring into space at the misery of it all.
2. Brush it off with a ‘win some, lose some’ shrug. Then have an attack of ‘imposter syndrome’ and secretly wonder if you’re actually any good at your job.
3. Look on it as valuable feedback and as a learning experience, brainstorming with your team as to why you didn’t reach your intended goal and what you can do to perform better in future.

 

How good are you at your job?

1. I’m OK. Well, I haven’t been fired yet, at least.
2. I’m fabulous at my job. I’m one of the most talented and dynamic people in the company.
3. I am very good at my job. I use my strengths and skills effectively to bring creative solutions and real value to the table — and I am always learning.

 

A role comes up at work that is exciting and challenging but a little outside your current scope. Do you:

1. Think that you would like to apply for something like that in a few years’ time when you have the necessarily skills.
2. Apply, interview — telling them exactly why they should hire you — then follow up every day until you get an answer.
3. Feel nervous, but know that you don’t need to know everything about the role to do it well. You have strong skill and are a quick learner — and it is worth applying.

 

You are on a business trip and miss your flight connection. Who do you blame?

1. Myself. I’m a terrible timekeeper. I am not sure why they keep sending me out to meet clients. I’ll now have to pay for a new flight from my own pocket…
2. My PA, for booking such a tight connection; the airport for being so large, and possibly the ground staff, too, for bad management.
3. I don’t do blame, really — sometimes life is tricky. But if I had paid more attention to my travel schedule I might have seen that the connection time was tight. In future, I will double check my schedule to make sure my journey is seamless.

 

Where is your focus at work?

1. On other people — it’s important for me to find out where I am by comparing myself to my colleagues.
2. On myself and what I can achieve. I am driven and ambitious and really think that I should be further along in my career than I am.
3. On the value I can bring to my company and how I can enrich and deepen my skills along the way. I like to think I am self-focused and a good team player, too.

 

When I look in the mirror I see:

1. Someone who isn’t as young as she once was, or as attractive as my colleagues, and who needs a haircut and a gym membership.
2. A good image. It takes a lot of effort to look like I do though — and I would never dream of going out without make-up on.
3. Someone I like. I look at the whole, rather than hone in on bits I don’t like, and treat myself well — making sure I am always smart and well put together.

 

When I make decisions at work, I usually:

1. Worry that I’ve made the wrong one.
2. Ignore any voices to the contrary and plough on with my decision. I have great confidence in my own decisions.
3. Consider things carefully, take on board any feedback and, ultimately, make the strongest decision I can with the most positive outcome — even if that is a difficult one.

 

 

Mostly As

Your self-confidence dial is set to low at present, but the good news is that self-confidence is like a muscle, it can be worked to become stronger and more resilient with effort. To start with, you need to learn to rely on yourself to build an unshakeable core. If you are always looking to others to determine how confident you are — or indeed capable — you will always be at a disadvantage. Trusting and valuing other people’s judgment of you more than your own judgment of yourself reduces confidence. To start building up a more robust sense of self, think about setting — and prioritise achieving — goals, no matter how small. This will allow you to gain more trust in yourself incrementally, which will create a positive feedback loop. Work on verbalising your needs and wants, putting things into perspective and taking responsibility for your choices, too — all of which will move the position of power from the external to the internal and provide a solid platform from which to grow in confidence. The everywoman workbook Boost Your Self Confidence has some great exercises and insights to help.

 

Mostly Bs

You believe in yourself and know without a doubt that you are self-confident. But how self-confident actually are you? With your outward bravura and strident, uncompromising approach, you may seem to others as if you have rock-solid self-esteem, but true confidence allows for collaboration with others — as well as the ability to evaluate your strengths and weaknesses accurately and admit when you are wrong, or need to learn something. Add a little warmth and flexibility to your approach and you can round out your confidence to a less abrasive — and more effective — style; one in which you naturally exude confidence, rather than having to shout it repeatedly at others in word and deed. Look at the everywoman workbook Boost Your Self-Confidence for thought-provoking exercises and insights to help.

 

Mostly Cs

You have a strong, calm and open sense of self and a great well of self-confidence to draw from. Making considered decisions that take into account both your security in your skill set, as well as contributions from others, means you feel confident in your capability. You take responsibility for your actions, which empowers you, and can move in and out of the bigger picture for perspective when needed — all of which creates a positive feedback loop of confidence in you. With your natural, confident equilibrium, you can afford to take more risks and push yourself out of your comfort zone in your career, knowing that you have a secure centre to come back to. Of course, confidence is a living thing, and to keep it alive you have to keep working on it — the everywoman workbook Boost Your Self-Confidence can provide more food for thought and helpful exercises to support you.